Day Care

So my son started Day care this week and I hate it. When I first took my job I took it because I'ld been able to get my mother-in-law and husband to watch him the two mornings a week I work. My husband's job has become INSANE and he can no longer watch our son, so Day Care (or quitting my job) was the only option.

I calculated how much money I'm making after I pay for day care .... it comes to about $300 a month. Right now I'm really not feeling like all of the stress is worth $300 a month, but the kids I work with are, and they deserve to have a teacher until the end of the year.

Our son has had a tough two days since day care. He's been very clingy and screams when I leave his sight. I'm not sure if it's a normal reaction or one caused by insecurity from his adoption. It probably doesn't help that out of guilt I'm letting him get away with more then usual.

I just feel like I'm feeding him to the wolves by sending him to fend for himself in a group of 6 other toddlers. No adult is capable of loving him, cuddling him, and teaching him when they have 6 other toddlers, even with training. As a teacher I would never claim I can teach a child better then their parents can (if their parents put the effort in).

So I'm stuck in this position of having to send him but Hating it the whole time. Other kids survive day care, so why can't I trust that my son will too. I guess my fear is that most other kids aren't adopted and don't have an emotional rollercoaster of past relationships, and Day care isn't really built to handle that.

I'm just praying God is going to open up doors so that my son doesn't have to be in day care long.